Rainy Monday musings🦋

The more I challenge myself to write the easier the words come but I find myself wanting the creativity to come easier, I find myself wanting to find my creative zone and not come out.  It is a happier place to be….. And why can’t I dive head first into that happy place? 🦋We shape our own reality- within reason…. As in; our perspective drives many of our actions and emotions. What about my life can I change to bring myself closer to that happy place? Whats my vibe I want to give off? How can I be more authentically myself? Decide it and do it….. Or analyze it to death until time passes and nothing happens of it- and I just keep chasing my own tail…. I am fairly sure I missed my call as a comedian, I promise if you knew me you would find that really funny. I am awkward the majority of the time, I am not necessarily outwardly a super funny person…… but if all the things running through my brain made their way out I would be hilarious!  Right now I am writing a story about a girls trip and I am trying to mold my characters to people I know…. One of those “loosely” based on real events stories. I want to make them very authentic to my friends but amplified times ten. The trip itself felt larger than life a few times! So far it has been fun to find the words to bring it to life!

Maybe I will introduce you to my characters as part of my writing challenge…. Just a little here and there….. My first character is named Aster she is the “bff”, the solid one, super tough chick but the heart of an angel…. She is also the one who is always right, stubborn as an ox and can and will call you out on your shit.  She has been through a whole lot really tough shit that would have broken a lesser woman- I am pretty sure at some point in the story she will make questionable choices and drag one of us out of the bad neighborhood, she has herself a little witchy woman in there too…. I feel like it’s part of our bond, I have a little witchy woman in me too but I shut her away most of the time. Of the 3 she is the most solid and well rounded, she is usually the adult in the room! BUT she is not afraid to let her hair down every once in a while. But she is so far ahead of me in so many ways, she grew from her challenges, took them on head on and has healthy coping skills….. LOL- I blew myself up and have to find my way all over again and the navigation is kind of a bitch for me so hopefully challenging myself will help me find myself.

 Today in my real life I have a little neib girl hangin with me, she is a blonde little cherob with little rosebud lips, she has this tiny little voice and has an adorable little lisp, I have to admit I can’t understand 90% of what she says the first try and still sometimes have zero clue what she is saying to me….. I have become that grama that has to keep saying what??… what???  She comes for a visit once a week so her mama can get her class hours in, she is working on a teaching degree, works full time and now has hours to do in a school classroom…. To be young and energetic…. Or just to be energetic…. Today when she showed up she told me her mom packed chips her backpack with chips and told her she had to eat them all, I asked her how any chips, she said four….. She opens her bag and pulls out 6 or 7 bags of chips, 6 diapers (she only wears them at bed time”….. Guess she is either planning to stay a while or has a bad case of trots her mom forgot to tell me about)…… yes, I do find myself amusing!  She is quite the little high maintenance diva!! She is such a little hoot to have around. She is now napping, she was not a fan of laying down……… for a good 2 minutes she tried convincing me that her mom tells her she “nener has to take a nap nener all the time” …… I totally understood what she was saying and turned off the light and she was out in minutes. She also got irritated with one on my dogs and I hear “thats a dick he is” after laughing until I cried (because yes I have THAT childish sense of humor) I got her to repete herself and she was saying “thats ridiculous”…. It was ridiculous!

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